Ironmaster

Consider this one if the spectacle of a gang of cavemen led by George Eastman wearing a lion's head battling a bunch of guys in obvious ape suits seems appealing. No nudity or overt gore but at least the music is by the De Angelis Bros!

Pulp

Pulp is a very enjoyable crime yarn from the early 70s starring the inimitable Michael Caine as a womanizing playboy novelist of such tawdry pulp fiction as “Trembling Knees” and “My Gun Is Long”. In his sardonic and self deprecating style, Caine’s novelist sees himself as an “imperial lackey” who is never shy of indulgences, including several 60s babes complete in miniskirts and gogo boots. The film has a light comedic tone and features a cast of eccentric characters notably played by an able cast that includes raspsy voiced Lionel Sanders and Al Lettieri of the original The Getaway. The film’s very methodical pace may frustrate impatient modern viewers but I personally loved it as it allowed me to climb into and immerse myself in the gorgeous 70s Malta location footage. This is a minor gem but I strongly recommend it to fans of 70s crime movies with a flavor of both noir and espionage.

Black Devil Doll

This briskly paced film features a misogynist racist black ventriloquist doll that f**ks, sucks and murders a series of big b(.)(.)bed California style p0rn0 slu ts (there is even an end credit for a breast augmentation doctor!). And not necessarily in that order. To enjoy this movie, you must reach down deep to find and embrace your own inner misogynist racist black ventriloquist doll. If you don't think you have one, you are deluding yourself. Yes, you ladies have your own doll too, it's just a little deeper down in your subconscious. If you positively refuse to acknowledge your inner darkness, you can at least watch in awe at the depths that the modern male psyche can sink to. Nothing about this movie suggests that uptight moral and upstanding citizens should be renting it, but I have all the confidence in the world that your zest for self-righteous indignation will overcome the obviousness that this movie was not made for you. I look forward to reading your hilariously overwrought 1 star reviews. But for freaks like me, BLACK DEVIL DOLL could not have arrived too soon.

Daughters of Satan

This movie truly exemplified the excitement of the unexpected during the pioneering days of IW, which seems so long ago now. The buffer loads and you suddenly realize that it’s MAGNUM freaking P.I in a 70s Filipino sexploitation obscurity?!?! Complete with girls in bondage getting whipped?!! Pinch me ‘cause I must be dreaming. It’s got the ole wife looks like a woman in a portrait from centuries ago which then leads to the wife acting increasingly odd until much mayhem ensues plot with some 70s bimbo standing in for the Barbara Steele character. A great trippy score and TnA compensate for the meandering plot and some rather unconvincing FX.

Bimini Code

Bimini Code is to be treasured by true fans of genuinely bad cinema. This isn’t the self conscious and targeted cheese of today; this is directly from the original library of raw source material! You must dive directly into its waters because there is no viewing possible from the safety of the cruise ship deck, my friends. All that the other reviewers say is completely true. But this is to be celebrated! At its core, this film is a cornucopia of bad acting, an irrational exuberance rarely found outside of European B cinema. In fact this may be one of the rare times I suspect that the lack of TnA somehow directly tied into the misfired cheerfulness that pervades the film and the acting performances presented. And…it’s got Hulk Hogan!

The Gore Gore Girls: Special Edition

"Abraham Gentry" "You mean-" "Yes... THE Abraham Gentry" HG Lewis does Dario Argento and Juno's head explodes! With murder scenes that are simply transcendent; there's just no other word for them. And complemented with boisterous marching band music to seal the surreal deal. Milk, French fries and Henry Youngman! Yum.

8 Heads in a Duffel Bag

Where is Joe Pesci? I want more Pesci!! Until then, his back catalog will have to suffice. This silly late 90s comedy is certainly no ALFREDO GARCIA but it is surprisingly engaging. One of the last Orion Pictures releases (and thus one of the closing chapters to the American International Pictures empire), this comedy actually feels much more in the style of 60s and 70s screwball. This is undoubtedly aided by the presence of the always welcome Dyan Cannon and Mr Leather Skin himself,George Hamilton. Morbidly tinged slapstick is what I would call it and the film features some truly odd sequences including having a bunch of disembodied heads singing a ditty or two. The great cast also features great performances from Todd Louiso , Anthony Mangano and Kristy Swanson. And David Spade is his usual annoying self. A breezy and entertaining time waster thats worth checking out.

Craving Desire

CRAVING DESIRE stars the incredibly beautiful Vittoria Belvedere and Serena Grandi, so that's already 4 good reasons to watch it right there. This 90s giallo was one of several that Sergio Martino directed when he came back to the genre during the 90s. I approached CRAVING DESIRE with full knowledge that Sergio Martino made this film without Gastaldi (script), Nicolai (music) and especially without the acting talents of George Hilton and Edwige Fenech. He did retain both the cinematographer and editor from his 70s heyday. Thus the movie is unsurprisingly a visual delight and the cinematography, sets and locations easily eclipse anything Argento has done in the 90s and beyond, imo. The first hour's mainly melodramatic vibe may test the patience of viewers seeking straight genre thrills but Martino keeps things interesting with some hilarious humor, both intentional and unintentional. His screenplay skewers and mocks the cast of disreputable characters, particularly Luigi's incredibly annoying fiancée. The MYA disc has both Italian and English dubs and yet no subtitles so. while one is forced to choose the English track, the dubbed moans and grunts during the many softcore scenes also had me chuckling. The movie kicks into high gear in the last half and really rests on Vittoria ably playing her darkly twisted femme fatale character and handily filling the "Edwige Vacuum" in this late Martino film. More psychosexual than black gloved mayhem, the film nevertheless exceeded my expectations and I heartily recommend it to genre and TnA fans alike.

I, Monster

Despite having a different name, this Amicus horror film is a pretty faithful retelling of the Robert Louis Stevenson morality fable. While it¿s decent enough, the pairing of horror icons Cushing and Lee had raised my expectations for what turns out to be a pretty average /minor outing for them. The blurry and poorly transferred Retromedia version presented here doesn¿t do the cinematography of foggy, candlelit 1800s London any favors either. A much more memorable pairing in a Jekyll/Hyde story was Paul Naschy and Jack Taylor in Leon Klimovsky¿s DR. JEKYLL Y EL HOMBRE LOBO. I, MONSTER does stand out for me as the only Christopher Lee movie I¿ve seen where he repeatedly shoots up and runs around all giddy. His legendary Dracula character, of course, would often appear with bloodshot eyes... yet he never actually toked up on screen. But Lee's Mr Hyde...I mean, Mr. Blake, is not as shy with the smack.

La Moustache

I was drawn to this movie by a fascinating premise that promised Kafkaesque meditations on modern alienation and personal identity, or perhaps a parody of same. Secretly, I was hoping that the filmmakers were going to take my expectations and run with it in unexpected or subversive directions. And I guess that's what I got, sort of. Well, not really. Since this seemed like the sort of movie to walk into completely green without reading any reviews or plot synopsis, I am only now looking at the other reviews and am chagrined and not at all surprised that CACHE repeatedly comes up as a point of comparison. Like that wildly overrated piece of crap, LA MOUSTACHE has excellent actors, production values and a strong opening. But it also just falls apart under the weight of its heavy-handed symbolism and pathological desire to seem deeper than it is. I lost interest around the time our clean shaven protagonist decided to suddenly visit Hong Kong and aimlessly ride a ferry all day. The cynical part of me thinks movies like this are primarily made so that fans of this stuff can write their little condescending "This isn't for those of you who like neatly wrapped up conclusions. Actual life just isn't like that, my dear, so stick to safe Hollywood formula movies" as they sip on some horribly flavored and overpriced caffeine delivery vehicle. No. There's actually a distinction between truly enigmatic art that resonates with deep themes and potentially uncomfortable emotions and lazy, confused filmmaking that tries to dress itself up as same while stroking its audience's egos. Sadly, I have to lump LA MOUSTACHE squarely in the latter camp.